Where are the signs?

Here it is already, the end of August. I am making some big changes - with God's help.

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Where are the signs?

Which way should I go?

I planned each step,

but now I don’t know.

Tomorrow is a chasm of uncertainty,

But, I will go there,

if You’ll go with me.

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Gentle Savior, lead me on.

Let Your Spirit light the way.

Gentle Savior, lead me on.

Hold me close, keep me safe, lead me on,

Gentle Savior.

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Why can’t I walk away from my regrets?

And why is forgiveness so hard to accept?

My past surrounds me

like a house I can’t afford.

But You say, "Come with me;

don’t live there anymore."

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And when I reach the valley every soul must journey through,

I’ll remember then how well You know the way.

I’ll put my hand in Your hand,

like a trusting child would do,

And say…

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Gentle Savior, lead me on,

Let Your Spirit light the way.

Gentle Savior, lead me on,

Hold me close, keep me safe, lead me on,

Gentle Savior.

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(David Phelps)

Get Off My Back

In the first part of this year, I was in an accident that totalled the little truck I was driving. ( I will always have a hard time calling it mine.) An eighty year old lady failed to yield right-of-way, and hit me on the driver's side door. She was driving a big boat of a vehicle, and it was no match for a little Toyota truck. The first memory I had after the wreck was a police officer standing at the side of the truck asking if I was OK. I was out for about fifteen minutes. I had back pain for about 6 months afterward, and the side of my head still hurts where I broke the drivers side window.
It changed my driving habits. Everyone had always told me to drive defensively, and it never really sunk into my thick skull. Intersections are still a little scary, and there is always a long line of cars behind me wherever I go - even though I maintain the speed limit or less than 5 m.p.h. over. Even the old people down here are pushy; they must be late for their shuffleboard tournament. Sometimes it seems more of a hazard to obey the speed limit than not! One person will pass me, and another person will take his place, just itching for a place where he can squeeze out around me. Sometimes I talk to them in my rear-view mirror, "Get off my back!"

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You know where I'm headed with this: many times I have doubts about the new direction in my life. Thoughts of inadequacy, incompetence, and inferiority. Even words from others: "You'll never be able to live it down. Why don't you just go on from here? You're doing this out of guilt"
Make no mistake - I am not comparing myself to Jesus here, but He also had well-meaning advisers, even close friends, who discouraged Him from doing the will of the God. In this case, Jesus had just told (Simon) Peter, "upon this rock I will build my church; and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it."

Matthew 16:21-26

From that time forth began Jesus to shew unto his disciples,

how that he must go unto Jerusalem,

and suffer many things of the elders and chief priests and scribes,

and be killed, and be raised again the third day.
Then Peter took him, and began to rebuke him, saying, Be it far from thee, Lord:

this shall not be unto thee.
But he turned, and said unto Peter, Get thee behind me, Satan:

thou art an offence unto me: for thou savourest not the things that be of God,

but those that be of men.
Then said Jesus unto his disciples,

If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.
For whosoever will save his life shall lose it:

and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it.

For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?

or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?

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Again, the words from Psalm 19:14 come to mind: May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer.

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Romans 12:1-3

I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.
And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.
For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.

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2 Corinthians 10:3-5 NIV

For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does.

The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world.

On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds.

We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

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Lord, Thank you for your Word. Please help me to take every thought and run it through the filter of your Word. May I never engage in disparaging thoughts about myself or others. Only You know all things, and only You know what the future holds for me. By your grace and the help of the Holy Spirit, I will live it for You!

It's hot

http://www.azcentral.com/news/articles/0829HeatRecord0829.html?&wired

We had another really hot day again today, and guess who had to go fix some RG-6 terminations in the attic of a residence with blown-in insulation? Oh well, at least the people were really happy to have ALL of their hi-def channels working - two of them were not previously. Gotta have the hi-def, you know? The 18v DeWalt batteries wouldn't even charge sitting in the shade - the ambient temperature was so high. When it's this hot they have to either be charged in the ac or in the morning before the heat gets to them.

6:05 AM

My pastor called me at 6:05 this morning just to say that he was praying for me, and to remind me to keep encouraged. a good start to an otherwise very hard day. I worked outside almost all day. It was around 108* here in "the valley".

Lifetime Guarranty

I bought some new Kobalt miniature screwdrivers from Lowes a few weeks ago. The terminals on the VFD's (variable frequency drive) I've been working on are small and the other Stanley screwdrivers aren't doing the trick. Plus, the Kobalt ones have plastic handles..... handy for when you have to work with the power on. Now, these VFD's are between 6 and $7,000 each, so I didn't feel too bad spending $15 on tools to work on them. Unfortunately, the pay scale for wiring and terminating them is the same as hooking up a phone jack in a modular home. Anyway, the first time they came out of my toolbag to hook up a new Allen-Bradley, the one I needed the most broke. The very first time! Good thing Lowes has an unconditional guarranty on their brand of tools. But that was a couple weeks ago, and I still haven't had a chance to return them and get a replacement.

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Why do things break? Is it because they are used for something other than their intended purpose? or maybe they were just poorly crafted, or made with poor materials?

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Why do marriages break that were meant - and vowed - to last a lifetime? This is one question for which I do know the answer. The reason: sin! And in particular, the desire to put my interests and appetites before my marriage partner's. selfishness.

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Matthew 19:5,6

And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?
Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

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Lord, help me on my journey to reconciliation with my wife and children. I have alienated myself from them and You. I would not blame them - my wife or children - if they never forgave me, or ever wanted to see me again. Also, please help me as I make plans to make right the many things I have done to others, namely - not keeping my word in paying people back for money I have borrowed. I pray that You will begin to soften the heart of my family: Heather, David, Danae, and Stephen. Prepare the way for me God, I have no other hope.

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My hope is built on nothing less

than Jesus' blood and righteousness.

I dare not trust the sweetest frame,

but wholly lean on Jesus' name!

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When darkness veils His lovely face,

I rest on His amazing grace.

In every high and stormy gale,

My anchor holds within the veil!

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When Christ shall come with trumpet sound,

Oh may I then in Him be found:

dressed in His righteousness alone,

faultless to stand before the throne!

Can God fix it? Yes, He can !!!

Amos 9:11-KJV

In that day will I raise up the tabernacle of David that is fallen, and close up the breaches thereof; and I will raise up his ruins, and I will build it as in the days of old:

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The sins and failures of my past weighed heavy on my mind again today. It is clear that Amos 9:11 is prophetic in context, but it is also clear that the God of the Bible is the God of restoration. I can remember well the day at PVBI that Dean McIntire told those of us in his class about a student that had written a paper with words something like... "the door of mercy is still ajar". I think the reason I remember it so well was the way our prof. gesticulated when he said with great emphasis, "the door of mercy is wide open !"

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Right now I have no idea what to do next - except to acknowlege Him in all my ways, and He will direct my paths. I have to make a conscious effort to give it all to Him.....

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the words of another David Phelps song.......

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You don’t say a word,

but I know you’re so afraid

Trying hard to take a step of faith.

You’re so confused

and you’re so alone

Standing face to face with the unknown.

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Every need you have

God already knows about it.

Still He longs to hear from you.

I believe if you put your trust in Him

That is where the road of faith begins.

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(Chorus)

'Cause if His eye is on the sparrow

when it comes to me and you

There is no place He won’t go

And nothing He won’t do.

Like a mother cradles a child

His grace covers us somehow.

So whatever you go through

God will take care of you.

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Change is never easy;

it’s just part of living.

There’s so much more that we can see.

A higher place so far above it all

Is ours when we’re faithful to His call.

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We don’t know,

We don’t have to understand,

The how’s, the why’s, the when’s

Give it all to Him.

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'Cause if His eye is on the sparrow

when it comes to me and you

There is no place He won’t go

And nothing He won’t do.

Like a mother cradles a child

His grace covers us somehow.

So whatever you go through

God will take care of you.

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(God Will Take Care of You written by: Nissi Walls, Jack Fowler and Dave Clark)

What are you going to do now?

I have often wondered what the cripple could have done. Peter and John were walking into "church", and noticed him by the door. The man did what he normally did - he asked for money. That's when the famous exchange took place: Peter (always the talker) said, "I dont have any money to give you, but I do have something for you - in the name of Jesus, get up and walk!" (Acts 3) It appears that Peter was also the one who extended his hand out to the crippled man. What if he had said, "naw, I think I'll just stay here. What if it doesn't work? I have a legitimate problem, and I know that I can at least get some money by begging."

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What if God were to suddenly take away a malady, start the healing in a broken relationship, or calm a troubled mind? Am I ready to change my lifestyle for Him? Or am I too comfortable where I'm at? What if God told me to throw away the crutches that allow me to go through life crippled and broken? Most importantly, what if I refuse His amazing gift of freedom from sin?

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Acts 3:10

And they knew that it was he which sat for alms at the Beautiful gate of the temple: and they were filled with wonder and amazement at that which had happened unto him.

Acts 3:11

And as the lame man which was healed held Peter and John, all the people ran together unto them in the porch that is called Solomon's, greatly wondering.

Acts 3:12

And when Peter saw it, he answered unto the people, Ye men of Israel, why marvel ye at this? or why look ye so earnestly on us, as though by our own power or holiness we had made this man to walk?

Acts 3:13

The God of Abraham, and of Isaac, and of Jacob, the God of our fathers, hath glorified his Son Jesus; whom ye delivered up, and denied him in the presence of Pilate, when he was determined to let him go.

Acts 3:19

Repent ye therefore, and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out, when the times of refreshing shall come from the presence of the Lord.

why is he blogging?!

It's a good question, and I am not totally sure myself. Rev. Gerald Mershimer told me once that he was roadkill on the information super-highway. I concur. Good thing we're both from Pennsylvania - if I had grown up in southern Arizona and heard that, I may have thought he was talking about one of the shootings or accidents on I-10! What a dangerous road.... reminds me of the internet in some ways. It is getting increasingly difficult to stay off the net in today's world, yet there are so many things that can go wrong, so many wrong places it can lead to. It has been amazing to me the way God has taken away all desire to go to the places where I wasted so much time in the past. If only I could hit the rewind button and go back.... to all the hours that could have been spent doing things with my family. God forgives, but time marches on, unforgiving in it's own way. It can only be spent once, then it's gone, along with all it's opportunities. But for now, thanks to God's amazing grace, moment by moment i'm kept in His love, moment by moment I've life from above, looking to Jesus 'till glory doth shine.... moment by moment, Oh Lord, I am thine!

1 Corinthians 15:57 says: But thanks be to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.

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Psalm 19:13-14

Keep back thy servant also from presumptuous sins; let them not have dominion over me: then shall I be upright, and I shall be innocent from the great transgression. Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer.

A Handful of Dust

A handful of dust, a worthless piece of clay,

Then you breathed the breath of Heaven.

Then there was the soul, the heart, the hands, the voice,

That could sing of your perfection.

Life is a symphony

That only you can play.

You know I can hear it through

The madness everyday.

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Virtuoso, Virtuoso!

This heart is your instrument

This life is your song

Virtuoso!

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There isn't a note of mediocrity

In all of your creation

And all the beauty

We create with human hands

Is only imitation.

Thunder crashes, waves crescendo on the sand

The wind that's whispering can only be your hand!

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A timeless melody of beauty and emotion

Perfect harmony, inspiring true devotion

No one else can play its chords

So graceful, yet so strong

You made the instrument and wrote the song!

This song, written by David Phelps, has been on my heart and mind ever since I heard it. I have made such a wreck of my life. I have brought shame to my family, my church, and my God. He formed me, gave me life, and gave me a strong Biblical background through family and church influence. Somehow, all along, I wanted to keep control of 'my own life', instead of just giving it ALL to God. Now more than ever I see the importance of yielding full control to Him.

And now, I pray, with all my heart, "Lord, this heart is your instrument, this life is your song. I should have given it to you sooner, before I made such a mess of things and caused so much pain and heartache. I regret the hours I have wasted, the idols I have worshipped, the energy spent on ambitions and desires that were not pleasing to You. Please forgive me. Thank you for being all knowing. Thank you for my mother's prayers and the indelible memory of her kneeling in prayer in the early morning hours. Thank you for bringing me to this place. The only hope that I have is You, and I am putting my life in your hands.


Oswald Chambers said, "We are not called to be succesful in accordance with ordinary standards, but in accordance with a corn of wheat falling into the ground and dying, becoming in that way what it never could be if it were to abide alone.